Death of the Critic

Why Did I Watch That? - Big Money Rustlas

Written by: Tom Blaich


I watched a bad movie today. It is sort of a guilty pleasure of mine. Watching bad movies that is. I revel in the terrible plots, paper-thin characters, cheesy effects, and wooden acting. It fuels me.
I love them in a way that I can’t quite describe, or feel about bad games or music. To me, bad films deserve to be recognized, talked about, and maybe occasionally ridiculed. This one is no exception.

Somehow this is going to go down as the first movie I watched in 2017. And in the realm of bad movies, ICP somehow managed to make one of the worst movies I’ve ever seen, yet I can’t quite think of another movie that. Revels in it so much. Like a bunch of tweakers tried to make
Blazing Saddles, the product is as messy as you would expect, but they clearly had fun making it, so it manages to be fun to watch. I don’t know who most of the people in this movie are (sadly my juggalo knowledge is just not quite up to snuff), but there is a small amount of chemistry between the cast that you don’t normally see in a movie like this that makes everything just click.

The plot is as basic as you can get. An intentionally cliche Western town has been taken over by a small gang, and when a man returns after a long absence, he decides to try to bring justice, as he is the son of the former sheriff. It is chock full of members of the ICP posse, and the main characters are of course the two lead “singers”, clad constantly in their “iconic” face paint. The gang is supported by a band of ghastly henchman, from the enigmatic Hack, who walks around in all black with a modern shotgun, to the ghostly Ghost, who for some reason shoots lasers out of his eyes.

“So what do they do besides look cool?” My mother watched in confusion as a man in a steam-powered wheelchair with a foot the size of a kindergartener attacked the town. Mumbling, “I’m the foot, bitch”, he was confronted by a young man who stood in his path, gangster firing a glock for thirty seconds at the target five feet in front of him. Later, a man will wrestle a mannequin for five minutes as poorly dubbed audio does its best to capture the lunacy of the scene.

It is the kind of bad movie that intentionally bad movies strive to become. It gives off this sense that a group of friends, however weird they might be, got together because they just wanted to play cowboys, and decided to film it. It knows what it is and revels in it, like a pig in shit. It’s almost childlike in its simplicity, but there is something compelling about it that makes it a joy to watch. I eagerly look forward to the day when I get to sit down and watch the other movie in the series,
Big Money Hustlas with CJ.

You should watch this movie. It is crass, offensive, stupid, but so goddamn fun.



Tom has been writing about media since he was a senior in high school. He likes long walks on the beach, dark liquor, and when characters reload guns in action movies.

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